Friday, July 24, 2015

Space

I wrote this after realizing that things that used to rile me up were not having the same effect as usual. It's like when I go to get mad, there's a gap there instead.

I'm assuming it's the medication, "smoothing out" the peaks and valleys. Lexapro: a steamroller for your emotional landscape.

~~~


I feel more chill, I can't get mad
I still get worried, but there's no edge
The rage just fizzles, can't even be brought
Things that once angered are now impotent
Even when my son pushes boundaries, pushes me
I get short with him, yes
But feel compassion underneath
There's a space where my anger used to be.

What remains is gladness, I feel happy
It's not acute, rather, I feel moderately
It's a little unnerving, so changed from before
When feelings took such swings
Would dominate and overwhelm

But now
There's a space where my anger used to be.

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